Hi there! Long time now talk, eh? I wish I could say I have been up to a whole lot but nothing special is going on around here. To be honest, I am just having a tough time right now. The “funk” I was having seems to be extending over a couple of weeks.
It’s one of those things I cannot seem to shake… It’s like a rush of emotions which keeps hitting me like a sack of bricks. Unfortunately, right when I think it is gone… I will just get this incredible feel of sadness in my heart. It sounds lame, yes, but it is so true.
I feel really unaccomplished right now. It is hard from going to being in school to being graduated, injured/recovering (constantly), and unemployed. I try to focus on the positive, breathe, set goals, yadda yadda yadda. Sometimes… those things just don’t work. At the end of the day, I just realize I am not contributing anything to the world and frankly… I feel like I am doing nothing in my life except for costing people money.
I know a lot of people go through this after they’ve graduated from school, but I feel like I’m going through a quarter life crisis. Is this even possible? I’m not really sure, but I just feel like I have no mission in life right now. I wake up and do the same thing almost every day. I could write my schedule hour by hour and you could probably text me at a certain time and say, “I bet you’re doing this right now”.
And, well… You’d be right.
As far as “recovery”, I have been pretty much on the up and up. I still have bad days, but for the most part… things are just getting better and better. I have some body image problems, but the thing is… This my body and if it is meant to look this way at a natural state… I’m just not fighting it anymore. Believe me, it isn’t all rainbows and butterflies but you get to a point of wondering, “Why am I fighting to be this way”?
Answer: There’s no justifiable reason except for control, perfectionism, and things which are so little in the grand scheme of things.
Aside from my ramblings, I just wanted to pop in to say thank you to Tracie for my foodie pen pal package this month (random, I know). My favorite thing in the package was a local dressing called, “The Pink Stuff”. Tracie said you either love it or hate it, but I am definitely a fan.
Thanks again, Tracie!
I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. I have been reading religiously, but just cannot seem to get my thoughts in order right now. I’ve been either a silent reader or letting you know I’m alive by clicking the little on Bloglovin’.
Well, my brother is here for a visit so I’m off to go spend some time with family. Catch ya later!